Are All American Actors Posh? A Serious Pajiba Investigation

Working class actors in Britain are a dying breed. They do exist, but they are a marked minority.

James McAvoy, son of a psychiatric nurse and a builder, addressed the increasing preponderance of the posh and wealthy in the arts thus:

«That’s a frightening world to live in, because as soon as you get one tiny pocket of society creating all the arts, our culture starts to become representative not of everybody but of one tiny part, and that’s not fair to begin with, but it’s also damaging for society.»

Julie Walters, daughter of a postal clerk and a builder and decorator, has also expressed her thoughts on the matter in the past:

People like me wouldn’t have been able to go to college today. I could because I got a full grant. I don’t know how you get into it now. Kids write to me all the time and I think: I don’t know what to tell you.

Working-class kids aren’t represented. Working-class life is not referred to. It’s really sad. I think it means we’re going to get loads more middle-class drama. It will be middle-class people playing working-class people, like it used to be.

In Britain, the arts are once again becoming the preserve of those who can afford to dabble in them, and this is a quiet cultural tragedy. It is something that saddens and angers me on a regular basis. Just the other day, as I was stewing in righteous class indignation, I caught myself looking Westwards. ‘But what about across the pond?’ I thought. America, despite occasional self-mythologising claims to the contrary, has a pretty incredibly class-stratified society—but there are still differences to how things are in Britain, with its centuries of heavily hewn and deeply worn divides. Maybe there, in the Land Of Opportunity, things were different.

I decided to investigate.

All those famous American actors—are they American Posh?

This would of course be a rigorous and scientific investigation, so it would need units, a scale.

But how to measure the poshness?

Easy!

With the Knava patented Walters-Cumberbatch Scale. One one end, Julie Walters—as already mentioned the daughter of a postal clerk and a builder and decorator. And on the other end, Benedict Timothy Carlton Cumberbatch—whose grandfather was a well-known and prominent member of London high society, and whose great-grandfather was Queen Victoria’s consul general in Turkey and Lebanon (!).

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And for the test subjects? A random cross section of prominent figures and Pajiba favourites.

Boom, let’s go.

Test Subject 1: Chris Pine
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Pine is from Los Angeles. His father is Robert Pine, a prominent actor himself, and his mother is a former actress who became a psychotherapist.

One of his grandmothers was also an actress, and one of his grandfathers was an attorney who became the president of the Hollywood Bar Association.

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Test Subject 2: Chris Evans

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Evans is from Boston. His mother is artistic director at a youth theatre and his father is a dentist.

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Test Subject 3: John Cho

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Cho was born in Seoul, South Korea. His family moved to the United States in 1978. He was raised in Los Angeles. His father, originally from North Korea, was a minister in the Church of Christ.

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Test Subject 4: Donald Glover

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Glover is awesome. Apart from that, he was born in California at an air force base, and was raised in Atlanta, Georgia. His mother was a daycare provider, and his father was a postal worker.

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Test Subject 5: Robin Wright

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Wright is from Dallas, Texas, and her mother was a cosmetic saleswoman, and her father worked for a pharmaceutical company.

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Test Subject 6: Emma Stone

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Emily Stone is from Scottsdale, Arizona. Her mother was a homemaker and her father was the founder and CEO of a general-contracting company.

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Test Subject 7: Channing Tatum

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Tatum was born in Cullman, Alabama. His mother was an airline worker, and his father was in construction. According to Wikipedia:

His family moved to the Pascagoula, Mississippi area when he was six. He grew up in the bayous near the Mississippi River, where he lived in a rural setting.

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Test Subject 8: Chris pratt

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Chris Pratt is from Virginia, Minnesota. His mother worked in a supermarket and his father was a miner who later remodelled houses.

As per Wiki:

Pratt dropped out of community college halfway through the first semester and, after working as a discount ticket salesman and daytime stripper, he ended up homeless in Maui, Hawaii, sleeping in a van and a tent on the beach.

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Test Subject 9: Zooey Deschanel

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Zooey Deschanel is the daughter of an actress and a cinematographer and director. She is from Los Angeles.

Wiki: She attended Crossroads, a private preparatory school in Santa Monica, where she befriended future co-stars Jake Gyllenhaal and Kate Hudson.

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Test Subject 10: Paul Rudd

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Paul Rudd is from New Jersey. His father was a historical tour guide, and once before that the former vice-president of Trans World Airlines. His mother was a sales manager at a television station.

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Test Subject 11: Mahershala Ali

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Mahershala Ali is from Oakland, California. His mother was an ordained minister and his father appeared on Broadway.

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Test Subject 12: Timothy Olyphant

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Timothy Olyphant is from Honolulu, Hawaii. His father was vice president of production at Gallo Winery.

Olyphant is also a motherfucking Vanderbilt. As per Wiki:

His paternal fourth great-grandfather was family patriarch Cornelius Vanderbilt and his third great-grandfather was William Henry Vanderbilt, who doubled the family’s railroad fortune. Olyphant’s great-great-grandmother was socialite Emily Thorn Vanderbilt, his great-grandmother was socialite Emily Vanderbilt Sloane and his granduncle was music producer John Hammond. His paternal fourth great-grandfather, Dr. David Olyphant, was born in Scotland and served as director-general of the Southern hospitals during the American Revolutionary War. His third great-grandfather, David Olyphant, and great-great-grandfather, Robert Morrison Olyphant, were both prominent businessmen.

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Test Subject 13: Michael B Jordan

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Jordan is from Santa Ana, California. His mother was an artist and his father a high school guidance counselor.

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Test Subject 14: Anna Kendrick

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Kendrick is from Portland, Maine. Her mother was an accountant and her father a history teacher who also worked ‘in finance.’

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Test Subject 15: Jennifer Lawrence

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Jennifer Lawrence is from Kentucky, and her father was a construction worker and her mother a summer camp manager.

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Test Subject 16: Viola Davis

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Viola Davis is from St. Matthews, South Carolina. Her father worked as a horse trainer while her mother was a maid, factory worker and homemaker.

Wiki says:

Her mother was also an activist during the Civil Rights Movement. At the age of two, Davis was taken to jail with her mother after she was arrested during a civil rights protest.

Two months after she was born, her family moved to Central Falls, Rhode Island, with Davis and two of her sisters, leaving her older sister and brother with her grandparents. She has described herself as having «lived in abject poverty and dysfunction» during her childhood, recalling living in «rat-infested and condemned» apartments.

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Test Subject 17: Rosario Dawson

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Dawson is a luminescent human being from New York City. Her mother was a writer and singer of Puerto Rican and Cuban descent. She had Rosario when she was sixteen. Her step-father was a construction worker.

As per Wiki:

At the age of 21, Isabel moved the family into an abandoned building, a squat on the Lower East Side of Manhattan, where she and her husband renovated an apartment and installed the plumbing and electrical wiring for the building, creating affordable housing where Rosario and Clay [her brother] would grow up. Dawson has cited this part of her history when explaining how she learned that, «If you wanted something better, you had to do it all yourself.

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Bonus: Andersoon Cooper

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HONK HONK! VANDERBILT ALERT!

Cooper is from New York City.

This is exhausting so I’m just gonna let Wiki tell the story:

Cooper was born in New York City, the younger son of the writer Wyatt Emory Cooper and the artist, fashion designer, writer, and heiress Gloria Vanderbilt. His maternal grandparents were millionaire equestrian Reginald Claypoole Vanderbilt and socialite Gloria Morgan Vanderbilt, and his maternal great-great-great-grandfather was business magnate Cornelius Vanderbilt, who founded the prominent Vanderbilt shipping and railroad fortune. He is also a descendant, through his mother, of Civil War brevet Major General Hugh Judson Kilpatrick, who was with General William T. Sherman on his march through Georgia. Through his «Vanderbilt» line, he is a second cousin, once removed, of screenwriter James Vanderbilt.

Cooper’s media experience began early. As a baby, he was photographed by Diane Arbus for Harper’s Bazaar. At the age of three, Cooper was a guest on The Tonight Show on September 17, 1970, appearing with his mother. At the age of nine, he appeared on To Tell the Truth as an impostor. From age 10 to 13, Cooper modeled with Ford Models for Ralph Lauren, Calvin Klein and Macy’s.

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I mean…

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——

Petr Knava lives in London and plays music

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The Pajiba Bucket List: A Comment Diversion

Since we’re all gonna die without healthcare dollars, what do you wanna do before you have unforeseen medical expenses that force you to agree to a Purge-like scenario in the very near future?

Remember, money is no object. Hell, reality is no object here. Behold, my Bucket List, which I definitely did not only create and think about for this post:

1. Somehow make Tr*mp aware of just how awful he is and how much pain and trouble he’s caused so many people, leaving him in a puddle of piss and tears. The piss can be mine or his, but not the tears.

2. Live at Disney World for a month.

3. Make a living as a writer, even if only for a short amount of time.

4. Travel to Europe and do things and stuff while there.

5. Do something that makes me proud.

What about you? Gimme those Bucket Lists.

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Fake Pajiba T-Shirt Model Also a Fake Donald Trump Supporter

I know that there are a ton of bots out on social media disseminating fakes news and propaganda for our President. I never really see them, but I know that last week, Russian bots generated thousands of tweets with #FireMcMaster and #deepstate hashtags, designed to undermine the National Security Advisor, and that Russian-linked bots have created a surge in #ResignPaulRyan in the last two days.

I rarely see these tweets because even on Twitter, I live in an echo chamber. But I know they’re out there. In fact, over the weekend, Donald Trump himself tweeted one of those pro-Trump bots. The dumbass still hasn’t deleted it, either:

You can’t see Nicole’s tweet there because the account has been deleted. Why? Because «Nicole» does not exist. Nicole is a bot. The original tweet, by the way, said: «Trump fights for us … Trump working hard for the American people….thanks,» followed by emojis of a heart and the U.S. flag.

«Nicole,» however, is a bot using a stock photo.

It’s bad enough that Russian bots are stealing stock photos of T-shirt models, but they’re lightening skin complexion, which is stupid fucked up.

There are scores more of these accounts, many of which use these fake T-shirt models.

You might actually recognize that fella up there from the header photo wearing a Pajiba T-shirt. Turns out, he’s both a fake Pajiba T-shirt model and fake Trump supporter.

He’s very convincing as a Pajiba T-shirt model, however. In fact, I am wearing that very shirt as I type this, in part because I wanted to be as good looking as that guy. It totally works, too! You should buy one. The other day, in fact, a woman at the grocery store approached me about my T-shirt, and I excitedly thought, «Whoa! Does she recognize the Handmaid’s Tale quote or the Pajiba logo?»

«Is that Spanish?» she asked.

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In the meantime, remember this: While Donald Trump continues to insist that he has 100 million social media followers …

… he actually only has 31 million Twitter followers, and HALF of those (or more than 15 million) are FAKE. Meanwhile:

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I bet that keeps him awake every damn night.

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James Cromwell Arrested During SeaWorld Protest, Doesn’t Realize Pajiba 10 Voting Is Over For The Year

We get it, Cromwell. You want to crack the illustrious ranks of the Pajiba 10. And maybe you will someday! Who can deny your rampant sexuality in Star Trek: First Contact, or the time you played that creepy Nazi doctor in the only halfway decent season of American Horror Story (what, I enjoyed the Asylum arc, so sue me). But hate to break it to you guy — voting is closed for the year, and the winners have been announced.

It was a nice attempt, though. We love brainy bad boys almost as much as we get turned on by the humane treatment of all creatures great and small (except, you know, the scary ones — lookin’ at you, fucking snake bastards). So turning up and joining PETA to protest the treatment of orca whales at the SeaWorld in San Diego was a good ploy — and timely too! Apparently a three-month old killer whale, the last born in captivity at SeaWorld, has just died of what appears to be pneumonia.



We hear you even wore a «SeaWorld Sucks» shirt and shouted into a megaphone. Be still our hearts!

«Orcas deserve a full life in the ocean, not a life sentence of swimming endless circles until they drop dead from disease,» you said in a statement. And we agree! Though we also sort of think PETA are a bunch of fucking clownshoes, so maybe next time find some cooler kids to protest with.

We’ll give you credit though — you really know how to hop back in the saddle. Just last month you were sentenced to 7 days in jail for refusing to pay fines related to your 2015 arrest for staging a sit-in to protest a natural gas site. We admire your passion and your «stick it to the man» attitude. We especially admire any form of protest that involves sitting. Keep this up, and maybe we’ll see you on the hotties round-up next year!

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The 2017 Pajiba Ten: The 10 Brainiest, Most Lustful Celebrities on the Planet

After weeks of anticipation and what I can only assume is our readers frantically refreshing their browsers every five seconds, the 2017 Pajiba 10 has arrived. The 11th Annual list of the brainiest, geekiest, loveliest, most thoughtful and lustful celebs is here. As always, the Pajiba 10 is comprised entirely of YOUR votes, so if you’re unhappy, you have no one to blame but yourselves. Fortunately, I think, few will be unhappy with this year’s Pajiba 10. It’s a phenomenal list assembled with more votes than ever. The list this year includes seven first-times, one second-timer, and two new Hall of Fame members (numbers 9 and 10 on the list).

This year, we also asked our readers to identity the Best Chris, and to be honest, it wasn’t even close. Evans was a distant second, and the other two (Pratt and Hemsworth) weren’t even competitive. So, let’s begin with Officially, Once and For All: The Best Chris:

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Best Chris — It had been a long-fought battle but finally, the majority has spoken. We, the people, have chosen Chris Pine as our favourite Chris. No longer will our non-Marvel dark horse languish in the background, unappreciated behind the iron abs of the Avengers (and the other one). Pine: Captain Kirk, Steve Trevor, singing prince, Streisand approved, soon-to-be sexiest scientist dad ever in A Wrinkle in Time … He claims the crown. And who could blame you all for falling for such majesty? The arguments may wage on but for once, democracy actually worked. All hail The Best Chris. — Kayleigh Donaldson

And now, on to the results:

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10. Oscar Isaac — What can be said about new Hall of Fame inductee Oscar Isaac that hasn’t been mumbled breathlessly before? To every movie he gifts with his presence, Isaac brings leading man smolder and dashing good looks coupled with a character actor’s range. He can pull off the struggling musician, trying to get his big break while being his own worst enemy. He was the best part of the woefully unfeminist Sucker Punch, making a creepy rapist ooze charm and disgust in equal measure. You’ve got reclusive genius; building female robots and tricking young Brits. A mysterious government killer hunting Jason Bourne. He’s Poe Dameron, X-Wing pilot and trusted fighter in the Rebel Alliance. The list goes on, believe me. Only a man who can accomplish all of these varied characters in the span of five years is worthy of making Pajiba lions moist from the hallowed Hall of Fame. — Jodi Smith



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9. Gillian Anderson — It was Friday night, April 29, 1994. I was 12 years old and 64-days new to this country. Besides my little three-person family, I knew no one here. I didn’t know the language. I felt lost and bewildered and overwhelmed. So that Friday night, I was sitting at home, browsing through what seemed like endless channels on the TV (back in the Motherland, we only had two) and I landed on something that immediately grabbed my attention. It was the first season of The X-Files, an episode titled «Born Again.» And besides the spooky and paranormal, which I always gravitated toward, the female lead is what caught my eye. Special Agent Dana Scully was the sort of role model a young, confused, and powerless girl needed to see: intelligent, persistent, and unwilling to accept the injustices around her. Gillian Anderson was cast in that role at the astounding age of 24, and despite having to share the screen with a domineering David Duchvony, she nevertheless persisted to convert the show to a Scully-centric feminist tour de force. Since that pivotal role, she’s given brilliant performances in Bleak House, Hannibal, The Fall, and American Gods, among others. She is a goddamn force of nature, and it’s about time that Pajiba honors her with a permanent spot in the Pajiba Freebies Hall of Fame. — Ursula Scully

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8. Janelle Monáe — I thought about just dropping a .GIF of the wondrous Ms. Monáe from her ‘Yoga’ music video and just dusting my hands off and walking away. But then I realized that she deserves more than that. She deserves the world. Monáe is one of those almost preternaturally lovely women, and she’s been enchanting people with her rhythm, movement, and voice since her first full-length album, The ArchAndroid, blew up in 2010. She’s an immense talent with a unique vision, a lyricist and writer as well as an artist and a fashion icon who doesn’t give a shit about gender norms. But recent years have shown that she’s also a remarkably talented actress, and between her turns in Moonlight and Hidden Figures, she’s become even more of a force to be reckoned with. So there you have it: a proud, gorgeous, intelligent woman who can sing, dance, and act her ass off. Thank you, Ms. Monáe, for giving us everything. — TK

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7. Mahershala Ali — Mahershala Ali—aka if a fine, well-aged scotch were a real human person and could walk and talk and invent the color yellow—has been steaming up your TVs now for the better part of 15 years. Always steadily working, he’s had recurring roles on Crossing Jordan, The 4400, Alphas, Treme, House of Cards… whatever the hell Threat Matrix is. (Personally, it’s what I call the mental calculations I perform when I look at a given month’s movie slate and try to figure out what TK’s going to punish me with. Really looking forward to The Emoji Movie, y’all.) But it wasn’t until this year that most of our collective lions stood up and took notice of the hotness and talent that Ali was laying down. 2016 was Ali’s year, and he was everywhere, whether joining the ranks of Marvel villainhood in Luke Cage, proving the standout of indie movie Kicks, or getting his respectful romantic lead on opposite Taraji P. Henson in Hidden Figures. I didn’t think «steadfast military man I met at a church potluck respectfully asks for my hand in marriage over a home cooked meal, after which he promises to look after my elderly mother and three young children» was a particular sexual fantasy of mine—not least because I have no intention of having kids, haven’t been to church in over a decade, and spend too much time speculating robot fucking to be all that vanilla—but God damn, here we are! Mahershala Ali sweats charisma, and he’s handsome as hell to boot. Never has that been more in evidence than in Barry Jenkins’ Moonlight, a role that netted Ali a well-deserved Best Supporting Actor Oscar win. And not for nothing, but the man can wear the hell out of a suit. —Rebecca Pahle



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6. Taika Waititi — New Zealand’s sexiest director earns his spot on the coveted Pajiba 10 with a mix of wit, whimsy, and face face face. Whether he’s playing geeky sidekick to Ryan Reynolds, dandying it up as a flustered vampire, promoting his critically heralded coming-of-age comedy Hunt For The Wilderpeople, or playing the fool for a good cause, Waititi wins our hearts and riles our lions with his penetrating brown eyes, goofy grin, sexy silver locks, and swoon-worthy sense of humor. And if that weren’t enough, he pulled together an all-star team of hotness, including Chris Hemsworth, Tom Hiddleston, Cate Blanchett, Mark Ruffalo, Idris Elba, Tessa Thompson and Jeff Goldblum, for what’s sure to be Marvel’s hottest movie, Thor: Ragnarok. And bonus, he introduced us to doofy surfer bro Thor, and his beleaguered roommate, Darryl. Not only is this New Zealander one of the funniest and sexiest humans on the planet, but also he’s mad generous, giving us more laughs and opportunities to ogle than any other on this list! — Kristy Puchko

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5. John Cho — He can get to White Castle. He can fly the Enterprise. He can make us watch a show called Selfie — and god help me, I watched EVERY. FREAKING. EPISODE. There’s a reason John Cho has become the literal poster boy for diversity in Hollywood casting, and it’s because he’s the complete package. Sweet smile, kind eyes, the way he fills out a suit. He’s the very personification of charm. He also can act most other leading men under the table — action, drama, comedy, you name it. He’s a man, he’s a movement, he’s a two-time Pajiba 10 certified hottie. Our fantasies are already #StarringJohnCho, so yes Hollywood, cast him in everything. We’ll be there with cash in our hands, hearts in our eyes and… well, you can imagine what’s going on in our pants. — Tori Preston

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4. Ruth Negga — Did y’all know that Ruth Negga is British? I only ask because in preparation for this post, I watched some of her late-night interviews, and was surprised not to hear Tulip’s expletive-filled, Southern drawl. And here’s the thing: I first discovered her in Misfits, where she and everyone else used their regular British accents, meaning I definitely should have remembered that she’s British. But so is the power of Ms. Negga. She can disappear into a role so thoroughly you don’t recognize her. Which is all the more remarkable given her face. The woman is startlingly beautiful. Like all time, classically, but still perfectly-imperfect and interesting to look at beautiful. But also I’m certain she could kick my ass. And I’m kind of into that? And her back-up career is to be a librarian? I don’t know what more to say, people. The woman was made for us. — Emily Chambers



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3. Kate McKinnon — When tasked with the glorious assignment of writing about why Kate McKinnon is so Pajiba 10 electable and delectable, I decided to go back to last year’s list and see what we said about her then. Except…she wasn’t on it. And I realized that, this time last year, WE JUST DIDN’T KNOW. We knew she was funny. We knew she was beautiful. But we didn’t know about this.

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We didn’t know about this.

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And we definitely didn’t know about this.

Just Nina Hartley nibbling on Kate Mckinnon's ear. Nothing to see here.

How foolish we were then. How young and naive. How tragic our lives were to have not yet sexualized Kate McKinnon. How. Fucking. Dare we. She’s hot. She’s hilarious. That second one makes that first one way more so. She’s also about to debut as Mrs. Frizzle in the new Magic Schoolbus, tickling a very specific fetish for some of us, I assume. I want to curl up inside her dimples and live there. I want to lounge for days on her upper lip as it stretches into her smile. I want to hear what her voice sounds like when she stops trying to make you laugh and starts trying to make you do something else. Welcome to the Pajiba 10, Kate. We’re sorry we took so long. — Courtney Enlow

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2. Jason Momoa — How do you like your hunks? I’m going for beefcake, rare, with a side of quizzical eyebrow. Jason Momoa has the physique of a gladiator and a naughty, smouldering glimmer in his eyes that seems to whisper, ‘hey you, wanna walk on the wild side?’ This Hawaiian Adonis is best known for his burly guy-liner work as Khal Drogo (Shekh ma shieraki anni — my sun and stars), though he’s been making hearts flutter for years in Baywatch, Stargate and Conan. Hey, he’s only been glimpsed in the DCU so far, and he’s already made Aquaman a star. Momoa looks like a guy who’d take you on an epic adventure, punch a shark, read you a poem, rescue a kitten, drink you under the table, then carry you home without breaking a sweat. You would believe literally anything about Momoa. How many guitar-playing, extreme sports Buddhists do you know? For a guy whose last name means ‘dry’ in Polynesian (fact fans), this is one Aquaman who definitely brings the sploosh. — Hannah Sole

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1. Gal Gadot — Yes, Gal Gadot is beautiful. And yes, Gal Gadot is a bad-ass (Israeli army, combat training, etc. etc.). And yes, my god, Gal Gadot is beautiful. But that’s not why she stole the Pajiba 10 this year. There are lots of pretty people on the list, lots of bad-asses. There always are. Rather, Gadot stole the Pajiba 10 for the same reason she stole both last year’s miserable Batman v Superman: Dawn of the Marthas and a good chunk of this summer’s box office — because her Wonder Woman is IT. Gadot absolutely shines as the Amazon warrior and has shown Hollywood that of course women can be bad-asses on screen, and of course women can be superheroes, and of course women can lead big franchise blockbusters (we see you too, Patty Jenkins).

Through Wonder Woman, Gadot is a symbol for what women actually are, not what pop-culture so stereotypically wants to limit them to:

When people argue that Wonder Woman should «cover up,» I don’t quite get it. They say, «If she’s smart and strong, she can’t also be sexy.» That’s not fair. Why can’t she be all of the above? (EW)

In The Dark Knight. Commissioner Gordon famously notes that Batman is the hero Gotham deserves, but not the hero that is needed at that moment. Gadot’s Wonder Woman is the reverse — she is absolutely the hero we need right now, even though I’m not sure we deserve her. But my god are we lucky to have her. Plus, look at how she looks at the best Chris (Pine). Gal Gadot just gets it. — Seth Freilich

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Pajiba 10 For Your Consideration: Logan Browning

I’ve really enjoyed the FYC posts for Pajiba 10 this season, but I’ve never written one myself.

Until now.

For your consideration, fellow Pajibans, I offer the talented Logan Browning.

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Logan Browning plays the lead role of Sam White in Justin Seimen’s Netflix show Dear White People and while the cast is full of talent, this show works spectacularly well because of Logan Browning.

I didn’t know of her before the show, which is something I really enjoy, and so as much as I’d like to post a litany of her prior achievements, I don’t know them.

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Not only have I never seen any of the shows before Dear White People, but I’ve never heard of them. Fuck, I’m getting old. Actually, I have heard of Bratz. I didn’t know it was a show, I thought it was a line of ungodly base-faced dolls from hell, which I know from various toy stores where I’ve said to my reaching children «absolutely not.»

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Here she is in Bratz.

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So.

Logan Browning. Dear White People to me, was an amazing, amazing show. I loved it. I watched it in like two sittings with longing and frustration during the in-between time until I could get back to it. It’s great.

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And she really shines. In the time since then, I’ve watched interviews and read articles about her and she just seems so down to earth, her head is screwed on right. When people ask her why she got into acting, she says it’s because she wanted to be famous. That just feels refreshing to me. She adds that, now, that’s not at all interesting to her, because she sees the fallout from it, but she thinks that lots of little kids just want to be «a star.»

She has that star quality in Dear White People. She has that captivating, eats-the-screen kind of ability. But, in interview after interview, this native Atlantan comes across as just wonderful. Over and over again. Someone that you can really root for.

Logan Browning is a world-class beauty, a talented actress, a dancer, and a person we can, and should get behind.

Does she need a best friend who can spell?

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Yes. Yes she does. But I’ll admit, I can’t fucking breath either in Trump’s fucked up dystopian nightmare.

Spelling aside, as you mull over your Pajiba 10 list this year, think about sneaking in a timeless beauty who can literally make any hairstyle work for her. Any hairstyle. That’s basically a superpower in and of itself.

Logan Browning, fellow Pajibans. Logan Browning.

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The 11th Annual Pajiba 10 Voting Commences Now: Who Are Your Five Freebies?

Today begins voting for the 11th Annual Pajiba 10. For the few of you who may not be familiar, this is an incredibly fun exercise we do every year. Our readers vote for our version of the most beautiful person in the world, although our list tends to give equal weight to a person’s intelligence, wit, and general attractiveness.

Annually this is one of our most popular posts, and in past years, we’ve even occasionally had folks acknowledge their placement on the lists. It’s super fun.

Here’s how it works, and please pay attention to the instructions because it makes it much, much easier to tally the votes. You all will compile your own Five Freebies lists — the five people with whom your significant other would allow a free pass (if you don’t have a free pass, just pretend). Very early on, the readers began compiling two separate lists: One with those of his or her sex, and another with those of the opposite sex. That tradition is baked in now (although not a requirement), although we should add that if you fancy someone who is non-binary, they can go on either list. The people who are mentioned most frequently make up our Pajiba 10.

Easy.

The staff has also put together a number of folks for your consideration (otherwise, our votes count the same as yours). They include Miguel Angel Silvestre, Misha Collins, Briga Heeland, Jason Momoa, Chris Evans, Donnie Yen, Shirley Manson, Barry Jenkins, Pablo Schreiber, Taika Waititi, Logan Browning, and Seth Meyers.

One caveat: Those who have been in the Pajiba 10 three times are no longer eligible. They’re in the Pajiba 10 Hall of Fame. You can still vote for them, but those votes will not count. We do not have any new additions to the Hall of Fame this year, though we do have a number of two-timers waiting to be added.

This year, we’re also going to throw in something extra: As a site, we’re going to choose the Best Chris: Pine, Pratt, Evans, or Hemsworth. At the end of your Freebies list, please add one of those names (either of the four Chrisses are also eligible for the Pajiba 10, as well, so if you have Chris Pine on your Freebies list, for instances, include him in both places).

Finally, and please note this format, because it makes it much easier for me to count votes. Write your lists, and then add your Chris. PLEASE USE A COLON SEPARATING ‘CHRIS’ AND THE LAST NAME. It will be super helpful in counting it separately. If you want to continue your comment or justify your decisions, please do so UNDER the lists.

So, here is my list, and yours should be formatted similarly (bolding is not necessary):

Opposite Sex
Briga Heeland
Melanie Lynskey
Kathryn Hahn
Kamala Harris
Carrie Coon

Same Sex
Ira Glass
Jon Lovett
Ryan Reynolds
Justin Theroux
Stanley Tucci

Chris: Pine

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Pajiba 10 For Your Consideration: Miguel Ángel Silvestre

I really don’t have to explain this pick to anyone who watches Sense8. If you’ve somehow managed to get through more than two episodes of that show without falling at least a little in love with Lito, and by extension Miguel Ángel Silvestre, then I don’t know if you’re actually human. First of all, he’s incredibly handsome. Like, stunningly so. But more than his looks, what really got me on his side was this scene where he’s channeling Sun’s menstrual cramps and mood swings.

The Spanish actor was originally a tennis player and won a Mister Castelló pageant in 2002. Which he obviously should’ve because, c’mon, look at him:

If there was ever a live-action Archer movie he’d be a shoe-in. The accent would be hard to work around, but I think the trade-off is worth it for that jawline. These days he’s keeping in shape with some new hobbies:

Oh, did I mention yet that he’s friends with other Pajiba favorite, Pedro Pascal?

Lito steals Oberyn's hat. #gameofthrones #sense8 Lito le roba la gorra a Oberyn! #narcosseason3

A post shared by Miguel Angel Silvestre (@miguelangelsilvestre) on

But really, I think that Sense8 displayed his beauty to its fullest effect. Often with a hand from his on-screen partner Alfonso Herrera. Like this scene where they go for a frolic in the ocean wearing the least amount of clothing legally allowed on most beaches.

Sense8 may be gone from our screens but it will never be gone from our hearts. Or minds. Or other parts. And Miguel Ángel Silvestre is personally responsible for an awful lot of those fond feelings. He deserves a place on your Pajiba 10.

📷 #mark&donat @miguel_barbera

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Pajiba 10 For Your Consideration: Donnie Yen

I have spent a lot of time thinking about who I should present to you, dear readers, as my first foray into the Pajiba 10. Because inevitably, these sorts of nominations reflect back on the writer. Do I want to impress you? Intimidate you? Pander, please, suck up? Do I go obscure, or pick a zeitgeisty fave of the now? Do I throw up my hands, say «fuck it,» and nominate a cartoon character?

(I couldn’t decide if I’m more attracted to Rick Sanchez or One-Punch Man, so that idea was out.)

In the end, I opted for honesty. And I know it’s not particularly progressive of me as a modern woman, but I have to say it: I love a man who kicks some ass. That’s not to say that I don’t also love a man who speaks eloquently, helps children, saves puppies, cooks and reads a nice thick book on the subway. I love a man in glasses. Heck, my husband rocks a man-bun. My libido is all over the place (read: easy).

And when I say I love a man who kicks ass, I don’t even really mean «man» — I mean anyone who looks like they could protect me in a dark alley. Spending my formative years watching Buffy has ruined me, and now it takes more than a little flash of protein-shake-and-CrossFit muscle to turn me on. It’s not what the body looks like, but how the body is used. I want people who really learned their fight choreography, or better, people who choreographed their own fights. I want long takes with little editing, so I can see that the actors really know what they are doing. I want danger and creativity. I want to be in awe of just how much the human body is capable of. I want the polar opposite of whatever the fights in Netflix’s Iron Fist were supposed to be.

I want me some Donnie Fucking Yen.

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And as you all analyze your options for this year’s Pajiba 10, I would humbly ask that you consider just how much you probably want some Donnie Yen yourself.

Since this is a thinker’s guide to hotties, I suppose I should come up with some timely justification for my pick. This past year has been good to Mr. Yen, to be sure — his blind warrior monk Chirrut Îmwe stole Rogue One out from under from that little rolling BB-8 bastard, and I have already rhapsodized at length about Yen’s palpable sexual tension with Vin Diesel in xXx: The Return of Xander Cage elsewhere on this site.

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But the thing is, Donnie Yen is basically timeless. This year is the right time to vote for him, because EVERY YEAR is the right time to vote for him. The guy is in his mid-50s and has acted in 70+ films. He directs, he produces, and yes — he choreographs his own fights. He brings the emotion, even when his fists are down. He has been in some great movies, and he has single-handedly redeemed some terrible movies. When the Weinstein Company set out to make a (pointless) sequel to Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon, they needed someone to fill the Chow Yun Fat-shaped hole in the story as a new love interest for Michelle Yeoh. Naturally, they went straight to Donnie Yen. Sure, the movie was sort of an unnecessary mess, but it was almost worth it to see Yeoh and Yen together on screen.

But enough of this jibber-jabber. Let’s appreciate the fine form of the man in question! Obviously you can never go wrong with some Ip Man Yen:

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Then there is almost-but-not-quite Jedi Yen:

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And here is uncomfortably attractive Monkey King Yen:

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I’d show you how good he looks in a suit but I don’t have the rights to any of the red carpet shots, so do me a favor and go google «Donnie Yen Suit» and look at the images. I’ll wait.

Wasn’t it worth it? The man knows how to fill out a jacket and tie!

Want to see Donnie Yen fight with himself in a fat suit?

I don’t know what they’re selling but I’ll take it!

There is even the basket of craziness that is 2014’s Iceman, where Donnie Yen is frozen for a few hundred years, then wakes up and has to pee:

Basically, no matter what mood you’re in, there will be some sort of Donnie Yen to match it. He is a man for all seasons. He is a man for all Netflix queues. And this year, I hope he’ll be a man in the Pajiba 10. Thank you for your consideration. I’ll leave you with this clip of Yen fighting Mike Tyson, just because.

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Pajiba 10 For Your Consideration: Misha Collins

Oh how I’ve agonised over picking someone to present for your consideration in Pajiba 10. My celebrity crushes tend to fall into categories: long standing devotion (hello, David Boreanaz), shameless lechery (hey, Alexander Skarsgård) or embarrassing wrong’uns (I’ll never tell)…

The world’s got enough Bad Boys, and legions of groupies to sing their praises, so I’ve been focusing my efforts on damn fine specimens of Good Guys. What I’m aiming for is the noble and glorious Guilt-Free Perv. No shame, no embarrassment, no ‘ignore everything you know about his personal life and focus on the pretty’. No ‘is it still OK to like him even though….’ Nope. Beautiful and lovely, inside and out, that’s what I’m going for.

This brings me to the chaps in Supernatural. The only embarrassment here is the embarrassment of richness in the hot guy department. What’s the collective noun for hot guys? Let’s go with sploosh (thanks Jodi!). That’s what this show has: a sploosh of hotties. Plus a sexy car and some classic rock.

You could dedicate much of your list to the lovelies of Supernatural. Hello, boys. We could argue Jared vs Jensen vs J2 for hours; there are Bad Boys aplenty with Mark Sheppard’s Crowley (that growly voice? Hello.) and Mark Pellegrino’s mischievous Lucifer as notable mentions. Even Battlestar Galactica‘s Tahmoh Penikett made an appearance. But on this auspicious occasion, I’m championing the guy who brought us Castiel, aka your new God, aka Agent Beyoncé: Misha Collins.

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Misha has it all. First up, he’s gorgeous.

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He can do smouldering and mysterious. He can do goofy and silly. He can put on a deep gravelly voice for the best part of a decade, just for us. His smile is like sunshine.

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You don’t get to see him smile very often, as Castiel usually has to look awkward and confused, but damn, he does that well, too.

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But he’s also the epitome of a Good Guy. Take a look at GISHWHES, Random Acts of Kindness and his social media feed! He’s fighting the good fight there as well.

Join me (& some famous people) in helping to take down Trump! Go to nopetotrump.com #NopetoTrump

A post shared by Misha Collins (@misha) on

He’s super cute with his wife and kids! He likes Wonder Woman!

Misha has it all, folks. Not only is he entirely sploosh-worthy, but you could take him home to your parents, and he’d charm the socks off them. He can save the world in a trenchcoat. He’ll make you laugh and give you a cuddle. He’s the ultimate Guilt-Free Perv. You’re welcome.

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