Mustache Rides At Bristol, Charlotte McKinney Does A Little Boxing & Julio Jones Goes to Kindergarten

We have umpires out here protesting now 

Protesting is HOT in the streets right now. It doesn’t matter what views or opinions people have, somebody is out there protesting for it right now. We’ve gotten to the point now where umpires are out here taking a stand because some players were mean to them (via The Washington Post): A group of Major League Baseball umpires is feeling singled out and put upon. So on Saturday, they decided to do something about it. After Detroit Tigers second baseman Ian Kinsler called out umpire Angel Hernandez earlier in the week, the World Umpires Association released a statement Saturday, saying “the verbal attack on Angel denigrated the entire MLB umpiring staff and is unacceptable.” In addition to the statement, some umps wore white wristbands during games “to protest escalating verbal attacks on umpires and their strong objection to the Office of the Commissioner’s response to the verbal attacks.” What a world.

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How The F**k Is David Tennant Returning for ‘Jessica Jones’ Season Two?

Look, we can debate about whether David Tennant’s creeptastic turn as the mind-controlling Kilgrave made him the top Marvel villain yet, but I think at the very least we can agree that he was a highlight in the first season of Jessica Jones (and also looks lovely in a pretty purple suit). So when Entertainment Weekly revealed that the actor would be returning to the role in the next season, I did a private little fist pump… before wondering how the hell that was going to work.


Because, uh, spoiler alert for a Netflix show that’s been around for awhile: Jessica (Krysten Ritter) kills the shit out of Kilgrave at the end of season one. Like snaps his neck kinda «kills.» And it’s a huge moment for her, because she finally puts an end to the source of her trauma and saves the lives of everyone he had mind controlled (including her best friend Trish). So how are they going to justify letting him pop back up in season two?

I’ve carefully thought this through, and in no particular order here are the options I can see:

He didn’t really die

This would be a huge cop out, but also not that unusual (duh, comics). Maybe he mind controlled everyone into perceiving that he died, and then got away? I hope that’s not the case because it would wipe out the impact of the previous season… but if it meant we could get more of Kilgrave in the future, I’d allow it.

He did die, but he came back

This is even MORE comic-booky. But considering his powers came from some crazy science experiments, maybe he also got some latent regenerative powers that kicked in? Or, hell, maybe a cosmic cube did it?


This is the most likely solution, though the set photos that are being circulated show Jessica in her leather jacket and ripped jeans, which seems like a pretty current ensemble for her. Still, they spent a lot of time together in the past, and those are stories that could be expanded on.

He’s a figment of Jessica’s imagination

The Jessica Jones we met in season one was still suffering from the trauma of her time enthralled to Kilgrave. He forced her to murder for him, and have sex with him, and act like she loved him. Even killing him wasn’t going to give her closure on all of that. So whether she’s haunted by him because of her own psychological issues, or he has somehow managed to actually worm him way into her psyche like a virus (comic books!), it wouldn’t be that surprising to find out that she was still seeing him around.

Oh wait, what if Jessica is LITERALLY haunted by him?

The MCU now has a mystical side, including Doctor Strange and even a Ghost Rider (thanks, Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D.!), so who’s to say that Kilgrave isn’t wandering New York City as an actual fucking ghost, trying to get revenge on Jessica? It’d be weird, but I’d buy it.

Kilgrave had a secret twin!

Ok, that’s more soap opera than comic book, so how about…

Kilgrave had a secret clone!

Ah yes, that is a tried and true comic book trope. Bring on the clones!

Marvel is just fucking with us

What if Tennant isn’t going to be in the show at all, and they literally drove a truckload of cash to his house to get him to dress up in purple and show up on set to mess with us? Seems unnecessary and highly unlikely, but would also be weirdly impressive?

Blame The Defenders

We are still a few days away from getting to binge the big team up that all of these Marvel/Netflix shows have been building toward. So maybe this photo was released this week because we are about to find out exactly WHY Kilgrave is still around? Wait, is David Tennant going to show up in The Defenders? Did the Hand bring him back?! HOLY CRAP!

What do you lot think? Give me all of you hottest takes and most baseless speculation in the comments!


Leslie Jones Freaks the F*ck Out When a Game of Thrones Cast Member Surprises Her

You might think you’re a big Game of Thrones fan, but few people can compare to the enthusiasm displayed by Leslie Jones each Sunday. The Saturday Night Live comedian stopped by Late Night With Seth Meyers on Wednesday for episode two of their «Game of Jones» segment, which proved once again that there is truly nothing more enjoyable than watching Jones lose her damn mind over the show. She and Meyers watched season seven episode «The Spoils of War» together, where she had some incredible observations about Game of Thrones characters:

  • «Bronn is the dude in the hood who knows where all the $ 1 cigarettes are.»
  • «Man, he’s high. Always out here by the tree. Spaced out. What is you smokin’, Bran?»
  • «Theon is a coward. He’s a coward! I don’t care if you got no dick. You did wrong!»
  • «Varys is like the girlfriend who you don’t really know if she’s your homegirl or not. One minute she’s supporting you and got your back, but the next minute you hear about some bullsh*t she said to someone else about you.»

After making her comment about Varys, the late-night host gave her the mother of all surprises when he brought out real-life Varys, actor Conleth Hill, to watch the rest of the episode with them. Helpful tip while you’re watching: don’t drink anything, because you’ll immediately spit it out from laughing so hard.

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Finn Jones Traded the Iron Throne For an Iron Fist — and Has Never Looked Sexier

Game of Thrones is full of eye candy, but some of the most gorgeous guys on the show also happen to be dead, and Finn Jones is no exception. While his character unfortunately met a bitter end during season six, the actor himself is doing quite fine since saying goodbye to Westeros. In fact, he’s traded the Iron Throne for an iron fist as one of Netflix’s leading superheroes on The Defenders. Get ready to melt over his baby blues as you scroll through his hottest pictures over the years.

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Jerry Jones Threw A Ridiculous Hall Of Fame Party For Himself

Of all the people we’ve seen get inducted into the Pro Football Hall of Fame, leave it to Jerry Jones to be the one who throws the most insane party for himself. Fits his brand perfect.

Jerry rented out a Canton Country Club for a cool $ 5 million to throw this thing and rumors started swirling early last night about who the private entertainment was going to be. Decent list here.

They were not just rumors. Justin Timberlake was, in fact, the main event at the party.

I’ve seen numbers floating around that there were about 1000 guests in attendance. I’m pretty sure all of the other HOFers in this year’s class just ditched their own personal parties and went to this one. Judging by the pictures, the only thing that was missing for it to truly be a Jerry party were some strippers and maybe a glory hole or two.

The best pictures & videos from Jerry’s insane HOF party

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Jerry Jones With The Mark Davis Cut, Dick Pound Rips The NHL & Megan Retzlaff Busting Out Of A One Piece

Football is back… and I stopped watching by half-time

How about that game last night? I did what I do every year and got way too excited for a meaningless NFL game, only to be bored by the 2nd quarter. Happens every year like clockwork. I’m not totally crazy about watching 5th string guys trot out there trying to make the team. But don’t get me wrong, I’m always down with the preseason, though. Give me any and all football. I need it like a drug, but when we start getting deep into the roster, I check out. Luckily I won’t have to worry about getting that next supply for the next 6 months.

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Alex Jones Is Somehow An Even Worse Person Than You Thought

So on the one hand, hooray! He’s back! Last Week Tonight was out for most of July which in Trump-adjusted-terms is like a solid year-and-a-half for normally scandal plagued administrations. But on the other hand, why you gotta ruin our dreams, John?

Because before the airing of last night’s episode, we got to believe that Alex Jones was simply a madman. One who had tapped into a rich vein of xenophobic anger, but a simple madman nonetheless. He might reasonably believe in Lizard People (who looked suspiciously like Hispanic people on Jones’ racist fevered dream drawings), and that meant that for a brief moment we could all enjoy the gentle hate screams of a legitimate lunatic.

And Oliver ruined that. Because of course Jones isn’t just a crazy person screaming at all threats foreign and domestic (mostly foreign though), and real or imagined. He’s a crazy person screaming at imagined threats for the express purpose of selling garbage that no one needs to people who probably can’t afford it. (Not that I’m defending Jones’ viewers. Not only are those assholes actively consuming these bullshit conspiracy theories, but they’re also actively supporting a man who attacks the parents of Sandy Hook victims because they’re existence disproves his theories on how exactly their children were murdered. Infowars viewers are garbage in their own way, but no one deserves to be swindled.)

Which makes Alex Jones worse than just a hate spewing, insanity machine. It makes him a fucking hack. He doesn’t believe in the accusations he’s making against gay water frog bombs. At least not enough to do so for no money. He’s not interested in protecting anything more than his own pockets. In fact, he as much as told everyone that when his ex-wife tried to keep their kids away from him (although I’m sure he had a very reasonable explanation for that for his viewers. Probably something about what he had to say to remain in the «system.» And I’ll bet he used the word «Jew» a lot).

Here I thought Jones was some kind of shining example of the power of true insanity, but really he’s just a charlatan. A snake oil salesman. And we’ve always had though. They’re ordinary. Poor Alex is so much worse than being a true believer (of incredibly vile things). He’s basic.


In Praise of Janey-E Jones, The Best Character in the Twin Peaks Revival

The more aggravating David Lynch’s revival of Twin Peaks becomes, the better it gets. Every moment the show swerves into a seemingly random tangent or rambles on about insurance sales or dedicates several minutes to the sweeping of a floor is a glorious reminder of the freeing power of being utterly perplexed. When the goings-on in Lynch’s world become even too bizarre for its residents, their refusal to react in the expected way can infuriate, but then again, it’s always been that way in the mind of one of cinema’s true geniuses. We haven’t spent much time in the eponymous town, eight episodes in to the Showtime revival. For the most part, we haven’t really been with Dale Cooper either, as the beleaguered agent fights to regain control of his body and mind following his imprisonment in the Black and White Lodges. For now, he’s Dougie Jones, Nevada real estate agent, family man and gambling addict with debts to repay — the masculine ideal of suburbia, mundane yet chilling. The Dougie subplot has divided audiences, but it’s also offered the show’s best character so far, Dougie’s wife Janey-E, played by Naomi Watts.

In a show full of characters just trying to get on with their lives as madness descends, Janey-E does it with the most aggression. Whatever suburban dream she has been promised has been torn to shreds by a philandering husband who cheats with younger women and has locked the family into $ 50k worth of debt. Life as Mrs Jones seems to be an utterly thankless task even before her husband was swapped out of the planet in favour of Dale by forces unknown. When we first meet Janey-E, having spent time with Dale/Dougie being dragged around a Vegas casino and making bank in the process, Watts runs the gamut of emotions as the worried wife quickly turns furious. The audience has seen the absurd journey of Dougie for so long and laughed at the awkwardness of it all, but there’s nothing funny about it to Janey-E — after all, he’s been missing for several days and the countdown to pay off his debts is still ticking.

Lynch has always known how to use Naomi Watts’s talents in the most intriguing and effective manner possible, which makes watching her work in this season all the more exciting, and just a tough disappointing to know that everyone else in the industry seems completely incapable of giving her good roles. In episode four alone, where her part is only a few minutes long, she does some of her best work in years, offering the emotional opposition to the seemingly aimless oddity of Dougie/Dale’s cluelessness. She’s relieved her husband is home, shocked that he’s accompanied by the police, angry he’s ditched her for days without a word, and exhausted by this cycle of spousal neglect she seems far too used to at this point.

To expect anything in Twin Peaks is a fool’s errand, yet the Las Vegas of the Jones family, with its never-ending rows of matching houses burning under the harsh desert sun, is a peculiar world where nobody reacts that oddly to Dougie’s sudden catatonic state. Indeed, it seems to have only improved relations with him. At work, Dougie has gone from a coasting insurance salesman to an unwitting whistle-blower on in-company corruption, with Dale guided by omniscient lights that also lead him to the luckiest night of slot-machine playing the state has ever seen. It’s the most literal interpretation of the ethos that mediocre men will forever rise to the top. If every great man has a great woman behind him, every middling man failing upwards has a woman holding him upright, occasionally literally.

Janey-E is a woman with a job to do, and she has no qualms about letting the world know she’s not happy about it. With so many cryptic conversations going on, Janey-E cuts through the fog with unstoppable force. She knows this world is bizarre, and getting worse by the day, so you damn well better believe she’s not going to negotiate with the loan sharks her husband is in debt to. She barely lets them get a word in edgeways while she makes her offer, emphasising how dark the world has gotten as she berates the crooks like they’re petulant toddlers. Dealing with the infantilised Dougie/Dale has put her through the wringer: She’s the «straight woman» to the clown who has long stopped being funny to her.

There is an increasing tragedy to Dougie/Dale’s fugue state, and the obvious impatience it elicits in Janey-E. The domestic unease it creates becomes more and more chilling as the Jones are forced to continue as if nothing has changed, as if the man Janey-E has been married to for at least a decade didn’t change height, weight and hairstyle in a flash and enter a semi-catatonic state. It is hinted at that Dougie, separate from the Dale situation, has suffered from «episodes», meaning Janey-E is dishearteningly used to this exhausting process wherein she, and others including co-workers and local authorities, must shove him into the most basic activities. Nevertheless, she powers on, pushing aside the puzzlement etched on her face, and she becomes Dougie/Dale’s fiercest protector. She has a role to play and she’s going to do it with impeccable commitment.

Naomi Watts became one to watch in Hollywood after starring in Lynch’s Mulholland Drive, where she played dual roles of sorts, not unlike Kyle Maclachlan’s array of parts in this season of the show. First, she was Betty, the bouncy Pollyanna starlet-in-waiting, the small-town girl who just knows she’s going to make it. The first time you watch the film, you can’t help but briefly wonder, as she bounces on-screen and talks like she’s reciting lines from a bad community theatre production, if Watts is actually a bad actress. It’s all too neat, too cutesy, and painfully naïve for a film drenched in unease. And then we meet Watts’s other character, Diane. She may be the reality to Betty’s pastel fantasy, or she could be what happens to Betty after too many years of crushing bitterness in the film industry. She’s frustrated, miserable, seethes with envy as the woman she idolises treats her like dirt, and has grown bored with pretending otherwise. The switch is jarring for the viewer. You wonder if something’s gone wrong somewhere, or if you’ve woken up from a dream. That’s when it hits you just how brilliant Watts’ performance is. Like the film itself, she’s monumental.

There’s a lot of Betty and Diane in Janey-E Jones, with the go-get-them drive of Betty mired in Diane’s smothering cynicism. Janey-E is the actress who got out of Hollywood before it poisoned her, but finds no satisfaction in the banality of domesticity. Dissatisfaction lies around every corner, but she persists, even if it means she has to drag her husband alongside her. With ten episodes to go, Twin Peaks could go literally anywhere, so predicting the fate of Janey-E and poor Sonny-Jim once Agent Cooper finally returns to our plain of being is a futile effort. Still, if Dale needs a cohort on his side once that happens, he would be smart to keep Janey-E Jones on hand.


Leslie Jones Has Accused The Ritz-Carlton Of Racism

BET Awards 2017 Arrivals

Leslie Jones hosted the BET Awards on Sunday night, and she had a great time. Although she wasn’t shy about letting it be known that not everything was great about the night.

Everyone knows Leslie Jones does not play when it comes to lodging a public complaint. The day after the show, Leslie hopped on Twitter to slap at The Ritz-Carlton for alleged hotel racism.

Leslie was pretty vague, but maybe she’s saving the full story for a TripAdvisor review.

Whoever runs the Twitter account for The Ritz-Carlton was quick to respond to her by saying that they were “very sorry” to hear that she had a bad time, and that they pride themselves on providing “excellent service to all.” They also asked her to DM them the details.

The Ritz-Carlton has a real mess to clean up here; they claim they’re currently investigating it. Leslie Jones is rich, famous, and not afraid to call a bitch out. They should have seen “Mrs. Colin Jost” on the reservation list, realized it was obviously Leslie Jones staying under a code name, and guaranteed a perfect stay. If Leslie wants a plate of Ritz crackers delivered to her room by Carlton Banks, she’s supposed to get it, right? What is the world coming to if a rich famous person can’t have a good time at an expensive hotel.

Here’s more of  Leslie at the BET Awards:



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