The season premiere of Game of Thrones proves that we’re in for a very wild (and possibly dangerous) ride. Well, everyone except for Samwell, who spends the first hour of season seven stuck at the Citadel serving questionable-looking food, scrubbing out bedpans, and restocking books. The Citadel is a humongous library where Sam thinks he would come for an easier life, but, as we learn tonight, he has to pay his dues before he’s allowed to seek out the knowledge he has come for.
Think of the Citadel as a university attended by all the Grand Maesters we’ve seen on the show like Pycelle, Luwin, Aemon, and Marwyn, who is introduced on Sunday. Located in Oldtown, the newest location to be added to our handy-dandy pop-up map, the Citadel is basically the stomping grounds of the Grand Maesters, and it’s also where prospective maesters come to train.
The end of season six sees Sam and Gilly arriving at the Citadel so that Sam could finally begin studying to become the new Grand Maester of Castle Black. Unfortunately for Sam, he hits a bit of a roadblock on his journey, doing less learning and more grunt work than he probably imagines. Not to mention that there’s a blocked-off area of the library that just happens to contain books with the information he needs to help Jon in his fight against the White Walkers.
The Citadel and Sam’s eventual studies are probably going be a big part of this season, since his main reason for journeying there is to learn key information on how to stop a White Walker attack. Hopefully he can get his hands on something fast, because the Night King’s army is growing fast (literally, as he has giants now), which means things aren’t looking too good for the people of Westeros right now.
This is not Jumanji. Jumanji was a board game, not a video game. They should call it something other than Jumanji.
That said, I didn’t hate the trailer. I wanted to, because it’s bad. But I couldn’t. I can’t hate on The Rock or Karen Gillan. Jack Black, I can hate on. But I laughed. It’s dumb. However, my kid will love it, and I’m a sucker for Guns n’ Roses. Shut up.
Hassan is 29, just like Rihanna, and is the heir to a huge fortune. He’s the deputy president and vice chairman of the family business Abdul Latif Jameel, and since 1955, the company has owned the rights to Toyota distribution in Saudi Arabia. His family is worth nearly $ 2 billion. On top of that, he’s also said to own a soccer league in Saudi Arabia called the Jameel League. In 2016, he was linked to Naomi Campbell after the two were spotted at the British Summer Time music festival in London.
If you follow Conor McGregor on any form of social media, you know about this giant mural in the gym he’s training at for Floyd Mayweather. He’s made sure to post about 100 pictures of it in the week it’s been in there. Which isn’t a knock, it’s actually genius promotion by him. And it’s so cocky that you have to love it.
I was just in the middle of putting together a really great roundup of hot, nostalgic Alec Baldwin photos when I stumbled upon this treasure from 1985. Immediately, I was overcome with a rush of emotions: not only does Alec Baldwin — who is shown hanging out on the set of Knots Landing when he was about 27 years old — look really f*cking hot, but he also looks remarkably like Ryan Gosling, who also happens to be really f*cking hot (photo of Ryan below for reference). How did I get lucky enough to find this gem? I plan on printing it out, hanging it at my desk, and staring longingly at it for the rest of my life. I encourage you to do the same.
We at Jezebel have breathlessly followed the news of the return of the KLF, the Eurodance conceptual artists/professional pranksters who had global pop hits in the late ‘80s and early ‘90s like “3 A.M. Eternal” and “Justified and Ancient” (featuring country legend Tammy Wynette). What began as a mystery that KLF…
In case you haven’t heard, USC quarterback Sam Darnold is going first overall in the 2018 NFL Draft. Yes. It’s a bit premature to be talking draft, but that’s what all the “way-too-early” mock drafts say so it must be true.
There’s currently an enticing job listing over in the Scottish Borders for a family who needs a nanny. The pay is over $ 63,000 a year, the kids are five and seven years old, and you’d get to live on a beautiful historic property that is absolutely, insanely haunted.
In 2015, it was announced that Hollywood, the Land of No Original Ideas, reached into a bag of past movies to butcher and pulled out Flatliners. It was announced that a remake of Flatliners starring Ellen Pagewas in the works. Info about more casting has been dropped along the way, but I mostly forgot it was happening until today when the trailer came out.
The plot is pretty much the same as the 1990 Flatliners. A bunch of students take turns stopping and restarting each other’s hearts and their experiment ends up going terribly wrong! The students in this one are played by Ellen (hey, a check is a check), Diego Luna (again, a check is a check), Nina Dobrev, Kiersey Clemons and hot British ginger James Norton. The model with a flatline for a personality Charlotte McKinneydid a cameo as a nurse who fucks James Norton. Beatrice Straight from Network currently holds the record for giving the shortest performance (five minutes and two seconds) to ever win an Oscar. I’m guessing that Charlotte McKinney is going to smash that record when her right tit wins Best Supporting Actress and her left tit wins Best Supporting Actor for their performance in Flatliners.
As everyone should know, Kiefer Sutherland, Julia Roberts, Kevin Bacon, Oliver Platt and William Baldwin were in the original Flatliners. Kiefer said last year that he’s playing his original character in the 2017 Flatliners, so this mess is a sequel and not a reboot. What I got from the trailer for Flatterliners is that it needs more of that creepy bullied child Billy Mahoney from the original. I also learned that stopping and starting your heart must jack up your hair game, because nearly everyone’s mane looks a wreck in this.
That looks like a TV movie from the 90s, but I don’t care about the original Flatliners enough to rage about this. Although, I should probably rage anyway as practice for when Hollywood announces other reboots of old Julia Roberts movies I care about, like Pretty Woman starring Jennifer Lawrence, or Dying Young starring Emma Stone, or worse Sleeping with the Enemy starring Emma Watson. Why am I even putting that out there?