These «Scary Potter» Horror Movie Posters Prove Hogwarts Is Spooky as Hell

Hear me out: if it hadn’t become a beloved family-friendly fantasy world, the Harry Potter series would’ve made a great horror movie franchise. Let me set a scene:

A scrawny, pale, quiet child sits in the darkness below the stairs of an otherwise normal middle class family home. A spider crawls across his chin, slowly, but he doesn’t bother to brush it away. He simply stares ahead, silently sitting in the pitch black, waiting for the mailman.

The woman of the house slides back the grate to the door, cautiously peering inside. She sees nothing. Then, all at once, a wide green eye appears right in front of hers. She leaps back, hand on her heart, while a wry laugh drifts out from the cupboard under the stairs.

«No post on Sundays,» whispers unusual orphan Harry Potter to his Aunt Petunia from the tiny, cave-like room. «No post on Sundays.»

Behind the horrified homemaker, the mail slot slowly begins to creak open.

. . . aaaaaand, scene! Unfortunately for scary-movie fans out there, a Harry Potter horror movie will probably never happen; however, the folks at Pottermore have given us the next best thing.

In a Halloween-appropriate feature, the Harry Potter fan site revealed B horror movie posters inspired by moments from the first five Harry Potter installments. The dangerous dungeon troll, creepy-crawly acromantulas, murderous mermaids, and massive giant Grawp make for perfect horror poster fodder, but there’s one piece of the art that stands out from the rest. Dolores Umbridge, who is horrifying at the best of times, fits perfectly into an ’80s-style scary-movie ad (with hilarious details like «A Hem, Hem Studios Production» at the bottom).

Check out the full Pottermore feature for descriptions of the inspiring scenes and their terrifying elements. We’re certainly on board with a «Scary Potter» series now; it turns out that Hogwarts is downright terrifying in a lot of ways!

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Taylor Swift’s New Album Is (Shockingly) A Burn Book Sing-A-Long

Taylor Swift and Karlie Kloss in Tribeca

Back in the day (in my head), you could stick a piece of coal up one of the buttholes of Taylor Swift’s exes and watch it turn into a diamond from them clenching so hard with anxiety over what she wrote about them on an upcoming album. An entire Zales line came from John Mayer! This time around, though, the clenching is coming from all the meanie ex-friends who wronged Miss Swift!

Us Weekly reports that Taylor will release Reputation, her sixth album, on November 10, and it will mostly be about her foes like Kim Kardashian, Kanye West, Katy Perry, and (because this is TSwift after all) ex-boyfriend Calvin Harris. A source says that she’s “definitely coming for the Grammys” with this one. Another source says she “only” has one song on the album about new boyfriend Joe Alwyn while another said the rest of the tracks are all about dRaMmmAAAaaaA:d

“It will be across multiple songs, somewhat cryptically but also obvious.”

Since we’re on the subject of Taylor’s possible enemies and frenemies, The Blast reports that Karlie Kloss is hosting a talk show on Freeform called Movie Night With Karlie Kloss. The show will entail Karlie inviting over famous friends for “movies, games, baking, and fun.” This so sounds like the sleepover from high school you didn’t want to get invited to when all the cool kids were at a better sleepover for “weed, kegs, and fucking.” Rachel Bilson, Martha Hunt, Jourdan Dunn, Ashley Graham, Kendall Jenner, Serena Williams, and Kaia Gerber will join Karlie for cookies and movies like Dirty Dancing. Even though sources claim all is well with Taylor and Karlie, Taylor is notably off the list of celebs stopping by Karlie’s show.

A source says Taylor declined politely to be on the Freeform show because of scheduling issues. But in my head, this was as middle school of a fight as you can get:

Karlie: Wanna come to my sleepover?

Taylor: No, bitch. You invited that fish-lipped Kardashian-adjacent.

Karlie: Fine, I’m not inviting you to my sleepover. And you won’t get any cookies.

Taylor: Fine, I’m going to write a song about your Midwest cankles. And not even include it in the main album because it wouldn’t even crack the Bottom 200 ‘cuz you irrelevant!!

And scene.

Pic: Wenn.com

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Radar Says That Abby Lee Miller Got Banned From A Prison Play Because Nobody Likes Her

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I barely made it past season two of Orange is The New Black but at least it’s given me a good working knowledge of the ins and outs of a women’s correctional facility. New arrivals should keep their head down, find a crew and not act whiny, privileged and obnoxious. Sounds like Abby Lee Miller, formerly of Dance Moms and currently of Cell Block 666, did not add “binge watch OITNB” to her pre-prison activities list because she’s totally pulled a Piper. According to Radar, everybody in prison hates her as much as everyone on the outside does.

Radar reports:

Abby Lee Miller’s dance career behind bars is over before it even started! RadarOnline.com has exclusively learned that fellow inmates have barred the 51-year-old former Dance Moms star from performing in the upcoming Fall Festival at California’s Federal Correctional Institute, Victorville, because they’re “fed up” with her bad attitude!

“The Fall Festival is where all of the women come together to celebrate. They put on dance skits and such. But they refused to even allow Abby to participate because they simply do not like her,” an insider told Radar.

Poor Abby! Barred from the one thing she was born to do; star as Roxie Hart in the Victorville State Pen production of Chicago! I bet she had been practicing so hard, doing a little Cell Block Tango after lights out and annoying everybody by screaming “I didn’t do it!” and “Lipshitz!” when everybody else was trying to sleep.

Radar adds:

“Aside from the few friends that she’s paid off with commissary cash, the majority of the women think she is a narcissistic bitch!”

Not our Abby Lee! She probably convinced her “friends” to use their commissary budgets to buy her makeup and costumes for the Fall Festival. She was going to use peanut butter for foundation, dab Kool-Aid powder on her lips and make a wig out of Top Ramen. She may be in the pokey but Abby still knows how to put on a show! But that’s all over now.

Sources say Abby insists she doesn’t deserve to be there and that she’s not being serious about what comes next. Since July, she’s been working on a 366-day sentence. Once she completes that, she’ll go off to a halfway house. Sadly, I have no doubt some network would love to do a show about the post-prison notorious child screamer-atter Abby Lee Miller. It worked for Roxie Hart. Why shouldn’t it work for Abby Lee?

Pic: Wenn.com

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Meet Melinda From TCU

TCU is one of those semi-underrated schools that’s just a breeding ground for 10’s. It doesn’t have the clout that an FSU or Arizona or San Diego State has, but you can’t deny their productivity. Also, let’s not forget to mention TCU’s football productivity, either. #4 in the country currently, just had Gameday in town, and I still feel like they aren’t getting enough respect.

So with that, let’s meet Melinda, a true TCU 10 from Houston. This chick is all Texas through and through.

[IG – Melinda]

Know a college girl BC readers need to meet? Let us know: mail@bustedcoverage.com or IG/@bustedcoverage.


Sports Gossip, Sexy WAGs, NFL and Hot Cheerleaders: BustedCoverage

Paul Pierce Continues to Be a Treasure on ESPN

It’s official: I’m all-in on Paul Pierce as an NBA analyst for ESPN. I honestly thought he’d be terrible but it hasn’t taken him long to settle in and unleash ridiculous FIRE takes. You might remember him ending any potential future GM hopes last week when he announced he would have chosen Andre Drummond over Anthony Davis in the 2012 Draft:

And The Truth kept the good vibes rolling tonight while discussing Joel Embiid’s minutes restriction. Like plenty of people, Paul wants to see more than 15-20 minutes of Joel… he just articulated that thought in the dirtiest way possible:

Joel has already played 13 minutes through a half of play, so Paul might have to settle for a little taste again.


Sports Gossip, Sexy WAGs, NFL and Hot Cheerleaders: BustedCoverage

Night Crumbs

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Tidal (yes, it still exists) held a hurricane relief benefit concert at Barclays Center in Brooklyn last night, and I guess Beyonce decided to pay tribute to Puerto Rico by dressing up in Jennifer Lopez drag. And poor Gorgon Heap from The Muppet Show. He was obviously butchered to make that stole – Lainey Gossip

Marchesa’s Damage Control Express has made a stop off at People Magazine – Celebitchy

Blac Chyna is suing all of the Kartrashians. And that means that there’s a chance that Chyna and Pimp Mama Kris’ kin will all be in a court room together. Okay, who’s going to pay off the bailiff to let a pride of lions into the court room before locking the door? – Reality Tea

Colton Haynes and Billy Eichner say that they laughed while filming their American Horror Story sex scene. I bet, but they would’ve really, really laughed if Colton Haynes was the top in that scene  – Towleroad

The towels are emoting more sexiness than Bella Hadid is in her bathroom selfie videos – Drunken Stepfather

Don’t look now, but that copy catter Bella Thorne is wearing the casual look you wear to run errands on a Sunday – Hollywood Tuna

Nina Dobrev wore a salsa dress by Laura Ashley and I’m kind of into it – Popoholic

In other words, Rose Leslie is my idol for humiliating Jon SnowPajiba

Say something nice about this new pic of Rami Malek as Freddie Mercury: Well, at least we can’t see those tragic fake chipmunk teef he wore in the last pics – OMG Blog

Gold medal-winning Olympian McKayla Maroney has come forward to say she was one of Larry Nassar’s victims – Just Jared

Pic: Instagram

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Bill Belichick Shut Down Tom Brady’s Bro Hug Attempt

The Patriots (and refs) did juuuuuuust enough on Sunday to win their fourth game of the season over the Jets. Not exactly the greatest win in the world since everyone thought the Jets were going to be racking up Ls this season, but a win nonetheless.

Tom Brady was his usual terrific self, and even set the record for most regular-season wins by a quarterback. Pretty impressive! But apparently not impressive enough to earn a bro hug from Bill Belichick as you can see in this gloriously awkward GIF below:

Might have to try out this handshake-and-run approach myself….


Sports Gossip, Sexy WAGs, NFL and Hot Cheerleaders: BustedCoverage

If You Are Vaguely Unsettled by This Image You’ve Got the ‘Channel Zero’ Experience Already

Riverdale on The CW at 8:00pm ET.

The Real Housewives of New Jersey on Bravo at 9:00pm ET. I know that I throw a lot of shit in the direction of The Real Housewives and I still don’t think this should be a TV franchise, but I have to say that Bethenny Frankel from the New York cast is doing a hell of a lot of work organizing aid for Puerto Rico as well as Houston and Mexico City. I guess if the celebrity in the White House can’t be bothered to help his fellow Americans, it’s up to other celebrities.

Channel Zero: No End House on SyFy at 10:00pm ET. I’ve seen some people asking about recaps or reviews of this and, look, I am an easy scare. I had to sleep with the lights on for about two weeks while reading House of Leaves. I never re-read Salem’s Lot or Pet Sematery, and will jump at jump scares I see coming a mile away. This is… not scary. I watched two episodes and everything seemed like it was built around a sentence that hinted at something creepy, but no one actually went back and did the work to put in the actual creepy part. Or the story part, for that matter. After watching an entire first season that felt that way («It’s a kid made of teeth!» «But why? And what does he do?» «…TEETH!») I gave myself permission to stop. If you’ve got a super compelling reason I should start again, let me know. For now, I feel like most of the imagery would work better without a story, because nothing on screen is matching what I’d think up on my own.

Mr.Robot on USA at 10:00pm ET.

Broad City on Comedy Central at 10:30pm ET.

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This Halloweentown Reunion Is Bringing Us Joy, Probably Infuriating Kalabar

The beloved Cromwell crew from Disney’s Halloweentown is back together again. Nearly two decades since the movie’s release, the cast reunited for the annual Spirit of Halloweentown event in St. Helen, OR, where the first movie was shot. At the festive event, Kimberly J. Brown (who played Marnie) was joined by her onscreen family: Judith Hoag (Gwen), J. Paul Zimmerman (Dylan), and Emily Roeske (Sophie). Sadly, the magical Cromwell family was missing its matriarch, famously portrayed by the late, great Debbie Reynolds.

In her Instagram picture in front of the town’s oversize pumpkin, Brown was clearly feeling the nostalgia. «What an amazing weekend!» she captioned the cute shot. «Thank you so much to everyone who came to @spiritofhalloweentown! Truly so honored that everyone loves to relive Halloweentown back where it all began❤️🎃.»

For those curious, Spirit of Halloweentown is a month-long event complete with haunted houses, street performances, costume contests, and more. Ahead, see pictures of the cast’s nostalgic return to Halloweentown.

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