Open Post: Hosted By The Dog Who Mistook The Moon For Her Ball

openpostdogmoon2017

This is Blue the border collie. Some may think she’s a real dum dum for mistaking the fucking moon for her playing ball, but others, like me, think she’s a real genius for noticing the moon at all. My dog doesn’t notice shit unless it’s made of bacon or is in his food bowl or on his asshole. Me too, actually.

Blue’s human Jessica posted this video of her barking at the moon after her other human pretended to throw her white ball. Blue went looking everywhere for her white ball, and when she looked up into the massive blueness above her, she spotted the moon and thought it was her stuck ball. I can’t laugh at Blue’s ass, because the moon is pretty much a ball, and also, I may or may not have mistaken recessed lighting for actual stars during an acid trip. And you know some Hollywood executive is going to watch this clip and get ideas. We’re totally getting an Air Bud movie where Air Bud travels to space after mistaking the moon for his ball.

Or maybe Blue didn’t think that was a stuck ball at all. Maybe she knows it’s a different land, and because the state of this planet is currently at “flaming Porta-Potty,” she wants to go to there. So the next time NASA launches a rocket to the moon and you get the idea to sneak aboard to escape the madness that is this planet, you may find that Blue already took your stowaway spot.

Pic: YouTube

 

Dlisted

In «Are You Freakin’ Kidding Me» News, We Now Know Rick Won’t Make It Out of TWD Alive

I’m trying not to feel personally victimized by Robert Kirkman this week, but he’s making it really hard. First, he teases a big crossover episode between The Walking Dead and Fear the Walking Dead but gives very little detail about how the whole scenario is actually going to work. Then, he goes ahead and casually drops the news that Sheriff Rick Grimes (Andrew Lincoln) — everyone’s beloved, rugged, and kinda-crazy zombie slayer and infamous lover of coral — is going to die. Like, really, truly die. And way sooner than we think.

«No one is safe,» Kirkman declared during a TWD panel at New York Comic-Con over the weekend. «Hopefully there have been points where you go, ‘Is this it? Is this where Rick dies?’ And he doesn’t. One day, the moment will come where you go, ‘Oh my god, it is!’ It could happen any time between now and 50 years from now. Fifty years, that’s not gonna happen . . . «

While the thought of Rick being taken out after all that he’s been through fills me with dread, Kirkman clearly knows what he’s doing when it comes to telling this story. Could this somehow connect to the glimpse of «old Rick» lying in a hospital bed that we got at the end of the season eight trailer? Well, with the «All Out War» storyline from the comic books imminent and the battle with the Whisperers on deck after that, we at least know that Rick will survive long enough to participate in both (at least he does in the books). What will happen to him after that? It’s anyone’s guess.

Kirkman went on to divulge that The Walking Dead‘s next storyline in the books is titled «New World Order,» which will introduce a group with extensive military training (which we can only imagine will serve as a threat to Rick, Carl, Michonne, and the rest of the gang). Until then, we’ll just have to wait and see what happens in season eight, which is set to premiere on Oct. 22.

POPSUGAR Celebrity

American Street Shows the Shifting Perspective of the American Dream

At the beginning of Ibi Zoboi’s novel American Street, which is a finalist for a National Book Award, is a description of the glass that separates the protagonist and her mother, who has been detained by immigration. In it, she wishes she could break through and destroy the boundary that divides the two. Serving as a metaphor, the glass shows how delicate the world of an immigrant who is desperately trying to achieve the «American dream» while still holding on to their heritage can be.

Fabiola Toussaint is caught between multiple worlds when at 16 she has to abandon her mother to go live with extended family in Detroit. Although Fabiola was born in America, she has spent her whole life growing up in Haiti and thus is unprepared for and unaccustomed to the American way of life.

It’s easy to mistreat American Street as simply another YA novel, and truthfully the obvious plot points do detract from an otherwise remarkable page-turner. There’s the description of trying to fit in at a new school, a potentially clichéd romance, and feeling disconnected from society as a whole. While it does follow the tropes of many novels directly marketed to teenagers, it’s doubtful that those are the reasons it is a finalist for the National Book Award, nor why it is likely to become omnipresent in public schools.

When reading American Street, it struck me how easily this book would slide into an already well-established high school curriculum. It could be taught as a companion piece to John Steinbeck’s Of Mice and Men or as a standalone for a historical discussion of immigration. The flexibility of the book is what makes it so strong, in that it addresses a spectacular amount of heartbreaking themes.

For the topic of immigration, unlike many other books on the subject, Fabiola is a teenager in modern times. This immediately gives a depth and a potency to her perspective, which will resonate with youth and adults alike. As she struggles to find her home between the two worlds, naturally, teenagers reading it would relate to Fabiola and the text would challenge American teens’ preconceived ideas of their country.

Set in Detroit, the descriptions are certainly not favorable. Even though she was imagining the great city to vibrate with hope and passion, what she experiences is a lot more heartbreaking and truthful. «There isn’t even a slice of happiness big enough to fill up all those empty houses, and broken buildings, and wide roads that lead to nowhere and everywhere,» Fabiola describes. «Every bit of laughter, every joyous moment, is swallowed up by a deep, deep sadness.»

While many American readers have become accustomed to thinking of Haiti and other such countries by their «third-world» description, for Fabiola, Detroit is more harsh and indicative of how America has failed a huge swath of people; an additional challenge in her struggle to acclimate to her new home.

Between the brutally honest discussions of drugs, abuse, and sex, Fabiola begins to enter a world of spiritualism to guide her. This seems befitting of her own monomyth, as a spiritual guide is necessary as the hero makes their way through the journey. Additionally, the spiritualism provides a touch of magical realism and allows the reader, as well as Fabiola, to escape into her other world.

Zoboi is a tactful writer who is able to, with sensitivity and breadth, give an emotional portrayal of a young immigrant struggling to make sense of her new world. While a different writer might have fallen into the trap of making America be the ideal, Zoboi manages to describe the difficulty of living in the US while still making authentic and dynamic characters who have grown up there. The reader will feel for Fabiola, as it challenges their beliefs on the «American dream» and what that looks like through a modern lens.

POPSUGAR Celebrity

Prince Carl Philip and Princess Sofia Share First Official Photos of Their Son, Prince Gabriel

Princess Sofia and Prince Carl Philip of Sweden welcomed their second child, Prince Gabriel, back in August, and now the world is finally getting a first look at their little bundle of joy. On Monday, the Swedish royal couple released the first family portraits featuring their two sons, Gabriel and 1-year-old Prince Alexander, and they are precious. The photos, which were taken earlier this month at the East Gate of the Royal Palace by photographer Erika Gerdemark, include a snap of Sofia cradling baby Gabriel as he adorably looks up at her and another of Carl holding Gabriel while Sofia carries Alexander.

Along with the shots, Carl and Sofia also included a sweet statement that reads, «A big and warm thanks for all the kind congratulations that have been received in connection with the birth of our son, Prince Gabriel. We appreciate your caring a lot.» According to a palace spokesman, Gabriel is set to be christened at Drottningholm Palace Church on Dec. 1, which means we’ll hopefully be treated to even more sweet family moments.

POPSUGAR Celebrity

Grab a Blonde and Miscegenate: The 10 Best TV Episodes of the Week

10. Great News & The Mick — I doubled up here because they’re both sophomore comedies that had good first seasons but look like they’re only going to improve in their second seasons. Now that Tina Fey has jumped aboard for an arc on Great News, it feels like a legitimate successor to 30 Rock. John Michael Higgins and Nicole Ritchie (yes, Nicole Ritchie!) are absolutely crushing it. Meanwhile The Mick is one of the most purely enjoyable sitcoms on network television now — it’s basically Sweet Dee from It’s Always Sunny with a rich, spoiled family that sometimes shows flashes of humanity (Scott MacArthur’s Jimmy is the scene stealer here). Hey! Did you know that these two guys were brothers?

9. The Deuce — I am invested. It is great television. I have gotten over my dislike of James Franco, and I love all The Wire actors showing up, but man, it is past time for Maggie Gyllenhaal’s prostitute character to climb out of the hole. Every week, she hits a new low, and at this point, IT’S LOW ENOUGH. (Only on The Deuce is directing porn films a significant step up, huh?)

7. American Horror Story — I never thought I’d say this about American Horror Story this far into this season, but I am legit enjoying it. Alison Pill’s character was killing me in the first few episodes, but to find out her «twist» has completely transformed the series. Also, I am not sure what the take-home message of the show is, but you gotta respect a guy willing to cut off his own arm to perform his civic duty, right?

6. Fear the Walking Dead — Three great episodes in a row! The show is killing off characters left and right and they introduced their own Michonne last night. If the show can shed Madison and Daniel and move into next season with a core of Troy, Alicia, Nick, Taqa, Strand and Nu-Michonne, it has a chance to be a legitimately entertaining series week in and week out.

5. Star Trek: Discovery — I haven’t seen this week’s episode yet (I wait and watch it with the boy on Monday), but I thought last week’s episode was great, and addresses a lot of the concerns Steven had about the series (Steven will be writing more about the status of the show later this week).

4. The Good Place — The show finds new ways to make it work every damn week.

3. The Mayor — I didn’t know how well the high-concept premise would work (guy trying to bring attention to his rap career runs for mayor and accidentally wins), but I absolutely loved the pilot. Lea Michele is somehow not annoying, Yvette Nicole Brown is amazing, and Brandon Micheal Hall is a goddamn delight. I am fully in.

2. You’re the Worst / Better Things — I’m doubling up again because there was a lot of great TV this week (and I can’t even squeeze in Brooklyn Nine-Nine, Lethal Weapon, This Is Us, and a couple of promising-ish pilots (Kevin (Probably) Saves the World and Gifted), but You’re the Worst continues its excellent television, although Gretchen — bless — doesn’t deserve Boone. Meanwhile, on Better Things, Sam offered one of the best ever explanations for why we fear falling in love, and how opening yourself up can completely wreck your otherwise fine existence. Also, notwithstanding how badly he screwed up that weekend date, how great has Henry Thomas been?

2. Halt & Catch Fire — That’s how you do a grieving episode, folks. It’s not about the weeping and the histrionics. It’s about cleaning out the house, packing up the stuff, and coping with the memories and the loss, and finding solace in one another. The episode made me sad to think that one day I will be reduced to «Remember when Dad …?» stories to my kids, and also anxious to ensure there are more «Remember when Dad …?» stories for them to remember.

1. Black-ishBlack-ish dropped the hammer on Christopher Columbus and by mixing Schoolhouse Rock and Hamilton, offered a powerful, fantastic history lesson on slavery and the Emancipation Proclamation. Whether you watch Black-ish or not, seek this episode out. It’s one of the most daring, profound network television episodes you’ll ever see.

Pajiba

Gilbert Arenas Exposes Mia Khalifa For Sliding Into His DMs

Former NBAer Gilbert Arenas turned the tables on Mia Khalifa today, as he took to Instagram to expose her for sliding into his DMs multiple times this month. Mia, of course, is a huge fan of Washington sports but unfortunately for her she put up nothing but bricks with the former Wizards superstar:

This is Gilbert Arenas so obviously he included a colorful caption about $ 150 being the price for his D:

@miakhalifa would slide in my dm #fortheD 😂😂the thirst is real since backpage is gone 😂😂😂this #Bihhh has no room for negotiations with me.. $ 150 or you better slide into #nelly dm for that raw dick behind a #walmart 😬😬

Mia is expectedly bummed about one of her favorite players blowing her up:


Sports Gossip, Sexy WAGs, NFL and Hot Cheerleaders: BustedCoverage

Did You Know David Fincher Is Releasing a Netflix Series THIS Friday, Because He Is

You know what’s refreshing about David Fincher right now? That he’s a middle-aged white guy with tremendous power in the industry who — as far as we know — has never sexually harassed or assaulted anyone! There are no rumors about him being an abusive asshole on the set. The worst thing anyone ever says about Fincher is that he’s a hard-ass perfectionist who sometimes does 50 or 100 takes, which I suspect can be emotionally draining for the actors.

It seems unlikely that he managed 50 or 100 takes of every scene in Netflix’s Mindhunters because it is 10 hours long, and that would have meant months and months of production (plus, Fincher is only a producer here, who also directed 4 episodes. Joe Penhall created and runs the show).

It is odd that so little marketing and promotion has been done for the series, which debuts on Friday. Then again, Netflix often does best when a show comes out of nowhere and surprises people: See G.L.O.W., the first season of Orange is the New Black, Making a Murderer or that American Vandal show (I’m working my way through it! But it’s premiere season! It’s taking me a bit!)

Anyway, Fincher knows his way around serial killer dramas (see Zodiac). Mindhunter is based on Mind Hunter: Inside The FBI’s Elite Serial Crime Unit written by Mark Olshaker and John E. Douglas, the latter author of whom is the basis for Jack Crawford in the Hannibal series of books and movies (he’s the guy played by Laurence Fishburne in the NBC show).

The show stars Jonathan Groff, Anna Torv, and Holt McCallany. The trailer looks great.

Pajiba

Allegedly Drunk Raiders Fan Falls and Suffers Arm Injury

smallfeedrewski46/Instagram

IG user @smallfeedrewski46 has a pro tip for Raiders fans planning to attend a game this season: slow down on that purple drank… or you might end up like this sad Derek Carr fan who allegedly took a fall and injured his arm Sunday:

The IG user claims:

Dui on the Concrete….Man breaks his Arm…had to get him sum Asap Medical Attention…Slow Down on that Drank n people

I mean, does this really surprise you after the day Raiders fans had? We found a guy taking a leak on the field, and, of course, others were out there antagonizing Donald Penn for some reason. A total mess and we love it.


Sports Gossip, Sexy WAGs, NFL and Hot Cheerleaders: BustedCoverage

Donald Penn Claims Raiders Fan Had Designs on Extorting Him

Donald Penn came somewhat close to flattening a rowdy Raiders fan Sunday after the fan allegedly antagonized him by throwing a bottle at his Rolls Royce. Donald added more to the story today as he took to Twitter and claimed the fan had this well thought out plan to be “like that dude that got punched by Draymond Green”:

Dominique Penn, Donald’s wife, says the screenshot came from Raiders fans who are watching their back:

Sounds like a plausible scenario considering a lot of fans are, you know, morons. However! The Raiders fan at the center of this has his own story, and he claims Donald called him a “b—h” two weeks ago:

He then uploaded another video saying he didn’t throw anything at Donald’s car and that he would never disrespect another man’s property:

Before dropping one last piece of defense: his own screenshot of Donald daring him to talk mess to his face postgame, which he obviously followed through on:

Looks like we have a little “he said, he said” situation here — though we already know most Raiders fans want to kick this guy out of The Nation regardless of the facts.


Sports Gossip, Sexy WAGs, NFL and Hot Cheerleaders: BustedCoverage

The New AHS: Cult Episode Was Edited to Be Less Violent After the Las Vegas Shooting

Image Source: Getty / Andrew Toth

The sixth episode of American Horror Story: Cult, set to air on Oct. 10, was originally going to open and close with a graphic depiction of a mass shooting at a political rally. In the wake of the horrific Sept. 30 shooting in Las Vegas, which left 59 people dead and over 500 injured, many wondered if creator Ryan Murphy would delay showing the episode. The episode, «Mid-Western Assassin,» will go on as scheduled, but that doesn’t mean Murphy left it as is.

While speaking at the New Yorker Fest over the weekend, Murphy revealed he and the rest of the AHS team decided to re-edit the episode — which was filmed well before the Las Vegas shooting — to make it less violent. Now, the show’s mass shooting, which Murphy described as «an obvious anti-gun warning about society,» will happen off-camera instead.

«Should you air it? Should you not air it? How do you be sensitive? My point of view was, I believe I have the right to air it, but I also believe in victims’ rights,» the 49-year-old showrunner explained. «I believe that now is probably not the week to have something explosive or incendiary in the culture because someone who was affected might watch that, and it could trigger something or make them feel upset.»

Cult hasn’t shied away from graphic onscreen violence thus far, but Murphy made it clear that «Mid-Western Assassin» would work just as well without explicitly depicting the shooting.

«So our decision was to re-edit it, and I felt that that was the right move. Nobody ever talks about victims’ rights. That’s sort of a weird emotional discussion that’s never bridged,» he added. «But I felt great sympathy for people who were affected, certainly, and family members and loved ones and people who are upset about the way the world is.»

POPSUGAR Celebrity

1 2 3 5